Monday, September 26, 2005
eXaM FevEr
tis will be the last entry for the time being...as i need to study for my promos...wat a sacrifice...hahahaz...anyway...i will not be away for so long...duh...i can tell u wat will be my first entry abt when i'm back..."bYE byE exaMs CELebratIoN" !! HAH!actually, this entry will be revolving around exams...dUh...cos exams are juz around the corner...u r really blind if u failed to see the situation now...soooo intense...as if everyone is training hard to fight a bIg scaRy EVIL monster..aka eXaM...I thought i will only witness this scene during 'A' levels...haH...i was so wrong...promos is already terrifying me...ppl are mugging...skipping lessons...photocoping past year papers...restricting themselves from sleep and tv...omg...i really wonder if these are all necessary??? i am really scared...cos as compared to these hardworking chaps...i'm so so slack...it made me feel guilty tat i'm not putting much effort as them...frankly speaking...i really hate to be under pressure...hardworking is not a virtue found in me...cos i'm far too lazy...only things like tv and computer can get me going...hahahz...but i guess i juz like things to be slow and steady...study is no exception.after being in the system of education for 10 over yrs...exams has become a undying trend...esp in peak periods...it's a mighty "virus"...cos all students will have "exam fever"...symptoms will be those acts tat i mentioned juz now...of cos it's not as severe as dengue fever...but it's enough to drain our brain power and energy away...slowly...we will become slaves of exams...cos we are always suffering...i realised we will always shiver at the note tat "exams are coming...die...haven study"...it's like a reflex action...we get paranoid sometimes too...over-exerting ourselves with pressure...and get sick eventually...or even "black out" cases...our mind juz went blank when we saw the exam papers...i exprienced tat b4...but only half "black out"...hahahz...ppl say i am a lazy gal...which is true..but i juz find it tough to be hardworking...cos i dun really concentrate well...tat's y my results sux...ppl also say tat if u work hard...u will score well...i have my doubts for this...becos there are times tat i think i did work hard...but i dun get to see the results i wanted...so i was like so disappointed...it made me ponder if i did put in my 100% or i'm not up to it...ironically...sometimes...i did not put in much effort...the results were satisfactory...so wat the hell is going on...?haiz...many ppl had many ways to study for their exams...my method is damn unique...hahaz...cos u will definitely opposed my method...i actually study in front of my tv...on...hahaz...u'll be saying..."aiyahz...no wonder..how to concentrate lehz..." but i juz cnt live without the noise of tv...and no tv sacrifice for me...hahaz...but dun worry...i dun do tat all the time...most of the time is for doing homework only...hahahz...i juz hope the exam fever will be over soon...i am already planning post-exam activities already...although i will be quite busy after exams...i'm happy cos at least...no need to touch books and notes for the rest of the year...hahahahaz2.5 more days to my exams...ahhhhh...stress! had to hit my notes now...sayonara...be back on 7th October...hohohoho...oh ya...and wish me luck...need all the luck tat i can get...
tat's it at 1:58 PM
Sunday, September 18, 2005
wHat aBt mE?
very long never blog liaoz...maybe not considered very long lah...anyway...juz want to say tat this entry will be my second last one (last one will be next week) for the time being…cos promos are coming…guess i dun have time to blog during these few weeks lohz...dun worry...i’ll be back after promos...miss me if ya want...hahahahz...i juz went for HSK exam and only had one word to describe...disastrous...cos the qns are rather hard...soooo “scientific” & “literature”...damn cheem lohz…and of cos...time was another killer factor...i think I’m gonna flunk my oral...cos it was totally horrible...i was like speaking broken Chinese...shucks man...the oral exam was very distracting cos everybody starts talking at the same time...even though...i had the habit talking to myself and talking to voice recorder...but this time...i juz stunned and stammered lohz...having oral thru voice recorder was such a bad idea...no interaction at all...and my nerves juz got me talking nonsense...argh...gonna fail...waste money...never want to go for this kind of exam liaoz...so demoralizing......nothing much happened in the first week of school...juz the normal lessons...had maths test lahz...which was hedious...cos i left 3d trigo qn blank...juz stare at it blankly...i really cnt see a thing...i dun have 3d eyes mah...actually...i have start mugging properly yet...i’m like in bits and pieces...terrible man...no choice...i have to clear my hmwrk first...b4 i can start on smthing...nvm...jia you to myself......did much thinking for myself recently...and i made 2 new discoveries abt myself...want to noe? Hahahaz…firstly...i realize tat i do crave for fame…izzit already an old fact? Hahahaz...cnt really rmb...but i do feel tat i want to be in the limelight...hoping to be recognize by ppl...ppl wanting to noe more abt me...or juz tat i want to have a certain achievement in life to fulfil my desires? Cos i really want to be noticed by others...having the chance to show off my talent and ppl appreciating it...but i dun really have a real talent of my own...cos for now...even my best talent, compared to others, is only at a “so-so” standard only...u may say tat i’ve low confidence in myself but the truth around me dampen my mood already...and I felt tat i wasn’t given enough opportunites to shine...but even so...i guess i do not have the courage to grab them either...i only have myself to blame...so smtimes...i wish to be extraordinary...i envy those who really have special talent...but i noe there muz be ppl to be ordinary...and i’m one of them......Secondly...i finally noe why i am sooo desperate for relationship at this tender age...imagine having relationships at the age of 16 and 28...can u see the difference? At 16 yrs old...u can enjoy hanging out with ur stead at fast food joints…shopping malls...walk home with each other...whisper mushy stuff to other...young love is always innocent and pure so to say...but at 28, things and perspectives are different...it will be more practical/serious/bland...as if it is at the stage of choosing spouse…thus…I really hope to experience a relationship at this age…as i cnt be 16 forever wat...dun really want to miss those lovey-dovey moments...and trust me...u’ll regret it...i also claim to be a love expert...but a inexperienced one...so having a relationship can give me a new mindset on romance stuff...it can be useful...hahahaz...but of cos...i’ll not be disappointed if i cnt find a bf...cos i cnt juz pick any guy anyhow...so i let fate lead the way...it will be like a bonus if i can find one now lahz...hahahahaz…so dun accuse of me being boy crazy now since u noe my reasons…being boy crazy can make me forget abt relationships...but actually...i only crazy for anime guys...which are unreal...cos they are sooo handsome lohz...do u think there are guys in the real world tat are as handsome as comic anime guys?(ouch...sorry to the guys out there..hehez) i seriously doubt so…no wonder i always day dream…cos only dreams got shuai ge…hahahaz...of cos in real life...i dun go for looks cos i am not good-looking either…y so harsh lehz...but character wise lehz…muz be good lahz...cos i am a gooood gal mahz...hahahz...maybe i will have an audition on who wants to be my bf? Hahahz...JUZ JOKING HOR...:P (as if i'll have ppl queuing up...bLaH...)...
tat's it at 12:01 PM
Wednesday, September 07, 2005
cIp fLag DAy---SeEn & hEarD
nearly been a week since i blogged...ppl are nagging me again to type something down...i am happy i supposed...this shows tat my entries are quite attractive so to say...hahahz...juz joking...thanx to all my loyal friends who never fail to visit my blog often...A BIG THANK YOU! actually...i'm planning to have another blog...mainly posting all my talent works...like novels, change of lyrics, scripts and maybe some book/movie/serials recommendations...hehehz...tempted to have a look? hehez...but it will only be officially opened in late nov...cos now got to handle my promos first...:PoOpS...guess i'm digressing...i wanted to post smthing abt the cip flag day i had done ytd. but firstly...i realised i been doing 2 cips in one week...juz did the yellow ribbon project(school organised) a few days ago...hoho...we walked abt 3.5km...got a goodie bag (yeah!)...got a lot of activites but i too lazy to participate...i tied a yellow ribbon to the "so called" tree (my photo was taken...yucks)...and got to talk to Mr Pang...my lep teacher...didnt noe he was quite chatty...hahahaz...zooming back to the cip i did ytd... Went with my classmates & yuzhi...this was my first time organising a cip...so kinda nervous...i was afraid tat i'll sux at being the person in charge...luckily...nothing really went wrong...juz tat...i was late...oOpS...anyway, all of us parted our ways to parts of s'pore...hoping ppl will donate some coins for charity...since the nkf thingy was juz over...yuzhi & i went to bugis...the guanyin temple there...cos yuzhi said tat there are many generous ppl there...guess wat...:)for the lst 10 mins...i was standing under the hot sun...taking the cans and bookmarks...hoping ppl will donate...guess i was too intimidating or wat...all shunned me like crazy...some of them even glared at me...oh my gosh...i think some ppl still couldnt get over the nkf thingy...there were also other charity organisations around the area...the volunteers were nice aunties...one of them even encouraged me to be more daring...dun be afraid...i noe...but sometimes it juz pissed me off tat ppl can ignored me completely...a smile of declination will do no harm right? however, my luck changed for the better when time passed...more ppl pitied me...so to say...so my collection began to grow...along the way...i met a lot of funny things...firstly...i was accused of being a malay and having a malay bf???...cos i was helping a malay organisation to raise money in front of a chinese temple...how ironic can it be? Later, i met my sch choir teacher...surprisingly...she rmb me...hohoho...she also donated cos i quite pitiful lohz...one nice young lady also donated cos her ex-stead in ny (her current stead was wif her lohz...lol!) the most interesting part was i witnessed a case whereby a china lady was handcuffed by the police...everybody was like so "ba gua"(including me! :P)...spectulating wat was happening...i dunno actually but later heard frm yuzhi...it was like illegal syndicate involving in a theft case....the lady was like bawling and kneeling...no wonder everyone stopped at their feet...seemed to be a great chance for me to ask donation but err...they are too engrossed with drama rama....yuzhi & i had a lot of fun while doing this cip...we even went to guanyin temple to "draw lots" (qiu qian)...i dunno how to qiu qian...so yuzhi taught me...after 3 attempts...i managed to "qiu" one "qian" tat's for me...i actually asked for my studies & love life during my 1st 2 tries...but since it's not working, i juz asked for my studies at the last try...in the end, the qian i got was a good one...but not related to studies at all...it mentioned tat "a marriage will be arranged and a son will be born..." i was like WAT? arranged marriage???? OMG...i dun wan...:( the cip ended with a slight despair...cos my can is not heavy at all...compared to my other frenz...their cans were like soooo heavy...almost filled up the whole can! I had done flag day 3 times and none of these times i had at least half can full...so i was really a failure lohz...i think i had to find other cip tat suits me...argh....but overall...this cip is damn interesting.... haiz...i left with 4 pathetic days to term 4...soooo fast..and i haven even touched any homewrk...ok...scold me for slacking...i have to pia all my homewrk as priority...hope i will have time left for some revision...or else...doom awaits me... :Pps: oh ya...i felt tat i am addicted to comics again..."chou xiao ya wang zi" is really nice...ahhhh
tat's it at 6:35 PM
Thursday, September 01, 2005
tEaCheRs' DaY sPeCiAL
hAppy tEachers' dAy! luv this day...cos it's a holiday...hehez...so i'm here blogging...juz for a while...:Pytd...it was tchers' day celebration in sch...i shld say the atmosphere was lacking...i dunno y...juz cldnt feel a thing...but the thought of going back to cchms got me excited...ironically...not becos of teachers...but to see my old pals...glad to see dor...recovering frm her grief and looking gd...she was the same old self...for ong...she was prettier...cos she tied up her hair...not like auntie anymore...hahahz...got to see some teachers in sch...they hadn't changed a bit...maybe it's juz a year tat passed...wu jiong changed his hairstyle though...but still look weird...hahahz...many of my teachers "left" the sch already...either retired or quit...didnt get to talk to any teachers...becos they are like superstars...bombarded by other students...so i juz left with ong to meet ping at bugis...ping was cool as ever...as she claims...she is a "guai" gal...hahahaz...seemed tat no one had changed...probably y our friendship was very steady...after lunch, we went to national library...it was my first time there...and tat place was sooo huge...we went to the reference section and read up a little...of cos...we gossip and chatted...i got to noe their perspectives on love...ping wanted her first love to last forever...ong wanted hers to be special...but for me...hahahz...i dun mind if my first love doesnt last...not tat i do not cherish it or take it too lightly...it's tat i think it's impt to experience ups and downs in relationships so tat one can learn frm the mistakes and become stronger mentally and physically...hahahz...maybe i'm wrong...but this is wat i feel for now....:Plater, we went to mos burger for a drink...and ong blurted out a guy tat fits her ideal kind of guy...ping and i spent so much time thinking who is the guy tat can actually attract ong...we were tortured by ong's stubborness...in the end...we knew the answer and indeed...we were shocked...i was very shocked yet disappointed...shocked becos i did not expect this...disappointed was tat i dun noe this guy well...haiz...after parting with ping, ong and i continued to chat...and she said she was tired of being match make with guys...i noe...cos i do have the same plight...but as long as u believe it's not true...tat it'll be alright...hehez...but i'll continue to tease her...cos it's really fun to see her expressions...hehehez...ppl often mistaken me as a boy-crazy gal...only like shuai ge...hahahz...i dun deny but i noe for myself...i admire shuai ge but doesnt habour any hopes of having one as a bf... becos i noe a gal like me rarely attract any guys' attention... it's not tat i had low confidence for myself...it's juz tat it is a fact and i'm willing to accept it....ong and my relatives encouraged me to slim down to look beautiful...i noe...but i wldnt be happy...cos i want to find a guy tat can accept the real me...b4 i make any changes...this kind of guys are rare but i noe there are...slimming is tough...really...so i need love as a motivation...cos it'll be very effective...trust me...hahaz...but of cos...i dun need it now...study is still no.1 & i am happy the way i am for now...i still rmb last time...i was being accused as a flirt becos i always looked so happy talking to guys...do u want to noe y? i was happy becos...there are actually guys who are willing to talk to me...making friends with me becos of my character...so i do treasure this kind of pure frienship...havin guy friends and gal friends have their own advantages...juz wanna widen my social circle...tat's all...and some more...flirting is juz not my forte...urgh!hahahz...juz i talked too much and revealed too much stuff...but i do feel better typing out all these crap...hahahaz...have to blog off now...need to study hong lou meng! yikes!PS: hey frenz...dun think i am undergoing depression/ love problems after reading this entry...really...i am really fine! :P
tat's it at 4:30 PM